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Dear Self,

When Aryanna asked you, as you passed the cow pastures, “If cows are to give milk, what are the bulls for?” you should not have answered, “To get the cows pregnant.”  if you were not prepared for the slew of questions that came afterward.  Remember, this is the same child that felt compelled to tell you she “has a hole down there”.  Next time, lie.  Please.

Yours Truly,

Yourself